When we die
by FirstClassAngel
Summary: Songfic. When Ireland an OC wins her independance from England, Erin and Arthur get hit hard as the finality of it sets in. Can they put the past aside and mend the rift? Rated T for Arthur's drinking.


**Independence is hard for both sides**

Author's note:**Erin is my own origional character and I DO NOT own Hetalia...TT^TT **

To _"When we die" _- Bowling for soup

_"I know that it's early,_

_and it's too hard to think,"_

Erin stared down into the tea that she had made that morning with a grimice. It was a tradition as old as time itself for her, but without her father to accompany her in the task it seemed overly unbearable and the thought of drinking it alone made her heart drop into her stomach. So she instead poured the contents of the cup down the sink and hung her head, bracing her arms against the counter.

_"And the broken empty bottles,_

_a reminder in the sink."_

Arthur knocked an empty bottle off the counter to the floor in his hungover stumble to the sink and it shattered on the tile. His head ached like he had just secured it in a vice and he missed the voice of the young lass that always helped him pull himself together and be more responsible so times like these woulden't happen. He stooped down carefully and began picking up the broken pieces, wishing he could do the same with their trust.

_"But I thought that I should tell you,_

_if it's not to late to say,"_

With each passing world conferance Erin tried harder and harder to prove herself a new nation, being even so bold as to contradict her former 'brother colony' Alfred in his rediculous speeches and offer more solidified, posssible substitutes that might actually be worth the try. She would glance at her father every so often and whenever the idea seemed it would take off there would be a gleam in his eyes she coulden't place...it seemed almost like pain.

_"I can put back all the peices,_

_they just might not fit the same."_

Slowly with every conference they had and the few heated arguments they got into over blindspots in her ideas, Arthur began to feel that like his other colony had, she would rapidly outgrow him too. She was already making strong alliances with the other nations and they seemed to enjoy her company quite well. Bloody hell, she was even getting along with the Soviet bastard without so much as one 'kol' out of him! He slowly began to feel smaller and smaller again as he seemed to realize she was better off independant from him, but just when he would start that train of thought Erin somehow knew and she would look at him as if she wanted to say somthing.

_"Cause nothing's worth loosing,_

_especially the chance to make it right."_

"Hey England, Can I speak to you about national matters after we finish up here?" The setence took more out of her than running shore to shore of her country, Erin was sure that it'd end up in another fight but she'd be dammed if she woulden't be stubborn enough to give it a stretch. He stared at her crinkling his brows together, probably trying to immagine what she wanted to ask after independence of all things...It truley seemed these days that he wanted nothing to do with her. They barely spoke even though they sat side by side at every meeting. After some time of an awkward silence he slid her a scrap of paper with the words 'Yes, we have a lot to talk about Erin...' She smiled inwardly at the glance he gave her, his mouth was stone serious as always...but as his daughter she saw the smile in his eyes.

_"And I know that we're gonna be fine,_

_and the tatooed mistakes are gonna fade over time,"_

As everyone left the confrence room Arthur watched the young redhead pretend to stack her papers together and put them in a file for next month. With a slight smirk he also pretended to gather his things, only to have the papaers scatter fom his hands when she threw her arms around his waist a minute or two later. There were tears streaming down her face as he turned to face her and instantly he froze, why was she upset? He took her by the shoulders and sat her in his chair, kneeling infront of her to wipe the tears away. "Ar cad iad na Erin ábhar?" ("What's the matter Erin?") He whispered softly. She shook her head softly grabbing the front of his uniform and roughly tugging him headlong into a tight hug._"I'm sorry papa. Please, let's stop this.."_ Was all he heard before he was hugging her back. He instantly hushed her, rubbing her back soothingly. "I agree, it's pointless and we're only hurting ourselves." Arthur looked up over his daughter's shoulder, seeing Alfred in the doorway with a soft smile on his face. He gave a nod and buried his head in the smaller girl's shoulder again whispering about how things would be different from now on.

_"Cause as long as we live time passes by, _

_and we won't get it back when we die."_

The next few months passed by much easier with the two back as close as they could could get without being one country again. Erin looked up in the middle of the meeting, fully agreeing with Arthur on the point he had made in Ludwig's speech. Other countries looking at her as though it was odd she dissmissed it with a smile and a flick of her wrist. "England makes a valid point, if we use up the reserves at once, we won't have any when we really need it." Arthur cast her a sideways glance, as if on cue she smiled and took a sip of her tea relishing the tasteful memories it brought back. They were definately on good terms again and at the moment no one in their nations was quarreling too horribly to bear. Sure things may never be the same as they once was, but now they had room to change for the better.

_"Well I know it's been years now, _

_and I don't look the same,"_

Arthur walked into the world conferance room and set his papers down infront of the chair he always claimed, waiting to greet his daughter after beeing unable to see her ouside the conferance this year. When she sat down besidea few minutes later next to him he was dumbstruck. She was much taller and older than he remembered...but she was _**unbelievably**_ skinny and looked as though she haden't slept in days. He tapped her shoulder and she wearily looked up at him as if just noticing he was the only other person on the planet then set her head down on the edge of the table atop her papers. "_My apologies, papa. Top of the mornin'_." Arthur was shocked to say the least...He had just seen her a month ago, what could have happened over ther to make such a drastic appearance? "Erin what on earth happened?" She drowsily lifted her head off the table and gave a weak smile. "_My potato crop was bad this year...really bad. I'm in the middle of a famine."_

_"And the hopes and dreams you had for me,_

_that you thought went down the drain."_

Erin looked up to see her father set down a piping hot mug of tea before her and smile. "Thank you kindly, papa. How've you been thes last few weeks?" Arthur sat and stirred his own tea. _"Fine, but don't you dare try to change the subject...why didn't you tell me this was going on mo chara?"(my heart) _Erin looked down at her tea taking a sip before looking back up. "I didn't want you to feel that you had to be responsible for me. I'm not a colony anymore..." Her father rolled his eyes and sighed frustraightedly. _"Just because you are a new nation does not mean you are on your own...that is what your allies are for Erin. It's okay to ask for a little help now and then...Starting today England will ship supplies into your harbors." _The younger nation looked down unable to meet his eyes until he raised her chin with a soft smile. She in turn couldent help but smile back...Everything was going to be okay after all.

_"And the room feels so empty where my pictures used to be,_

_and I can't say that I blame you but you can't blame me."_

As Arthur returned to his house in London he stopped before a particular frame in the front hall, he passed it everytime he came in or walked out for a reason. It held a picture of him and Alfred back when he was a little colony. One of him and Arthur when he was learning to fire a musket, and another of himself and Erin dancing around the kitchen one morning like loons. The one in particular that drew in his eye was one of him, Alfred and Erin all together playing in one of Irelands vast fields, Erin had just tagged Alfred and was now giving him a run for his money over the grass and through the trees. Both had a carefree look on their face as if they could be happy forever...but somethings just weren't meant to be.

_"And nothings worth loosing,_

_especially the chance to make it right."_

Erin and Alfred waited patiently in their hiding spots, the young girl behind the counter, the older boy hid just on the other side of the light switch. Waiting with eager giggles until the front door clicked closed they held their breath and crouched low. Light flooded the room. "_**HAPPY BIRTHDAY**_!" Arthur nearly jumped out of his skin turning white as a sheet and closing his eyes. "Pops?" alfred said poking him gently. Erin became worried. "Papa? Papa are you okay? Alfred I think we made him ma-" Arthur roared into laughter that confused the two of them more than anything until the started laughing along with him. "You guys remembered?" Arthur said finally managing to breathe. Both younger nations nodded and Alfred spoke up. "Yup even your age!" The older nation cringed. "Now now you can forget that anytime you want." All three nations laughed the rest of the evening away enjoying each other's company.

_"And I know that we're gonna be fine, _

_and the tatooed mistakes are gonna fade over time,"_

Arthur, Alfred and Erin Sat in her kitchen one afternoon enjoying a rare get together in thier busy scheduales. Suddenly the redhead got up and smiled, her jade green eyes sparkling with mischief. She wandered over by her half-brother and the smile grew. "_Alfred_?" He looked up in confusion pushing up his glasses. "_You're it!_" It took the younger blonde nation a moment to realize just what she said as she ruffled his hair and took off through the sliding door. He stood up smiling widely and letting out a goofy laugh. "You're gonna regret picking me over the old man!" Alfred cried taking off after her into the feild of grass behind her house. _"Bollocks! That 'old man' probably runs faster with all the fast food you eat Al!" _"Hey!" Arthur chuckled and reached into his pocket, drawing out a camera and shaking his head before walking out to follow the two younger nations.

_"And as long as we live time passes by, _

_and we won't get it back when we die."_

At a passing glance from any of the other nations, it would appear the two were arguing again. _"You bloody wanker get off me! I've got work to do! "_ Erin giggled at her father's outburst and clung to his arm instead. "Oh what a load of blarney you bloody fool you've had work to do for the past week and a half!" Arthur stopped struggling and instead placed the pen down beside the stack of papers. _"Why must you be so bent on disrupting my work?"_ Erin smiled and simply hugged her father from behind, nestling her face into the crook of his shoulder. "Because your getting to caught up in your work and I can tell your not enjoying yourself while doing it." He was defeated, by a mere setence and his defences fell with a sigh...ANY other nation but Erin and Alfred would think he was just moody as of late...But not his former colonies...He'd been swamped the last few weeks and had barely anytime to himself...A break sounded splendid. _"I suppose I could take a short break from my-"_ No sooner had the sentance begun when she dragged him over to a conversation with Alfred and Matthew.

_"Come over, come over, cause I gotta know,_

_if I am doing this all on my own,_

_Come over, come over, how can I tell you_

_if you're not here?"_

It had been nearly ten years since the famine and they were now sitting in Arthur's home in London for a spot of tea. They were talking on the diplomacy of thier nations in a recent attempt for peace at her northern boarders and so far it was going well. It wasn't that He and Erin were fighting...but their people were. "_I'm sorry papa, they're upset again that your part of the north is pushing it's protestant reform on them._" Arthur sighed. His people were stubborn, hell he was stubborn, but right now this was the farthest thing he wanted towards the younger nation...A war was on the skirts of thier borders just when everything seemed to be falling back into place. "I've tried to convince them that this isn't the answer, but my people want to listen to me about as much as you and Alfred did when you were colonies." Erin looked up at him in a silent understanding...It wasn't said as an insult, but instead an example. Those feelings back then were a thing of the past...the wounds had long since healed between them. "_I'm ready to work this out like we know we can do Papa...but I'm gonna need your help_." Arthur took her hand across the table and smiled reassuringly at her. "We'll get through this my dear..."

_"And I know that we're gonna be fine,_

_and the tatooed mistakes are gonna fade over time,_

_And as log as we live time passes by,_

_and we won't get it back when we die..."_

**Thanks for reading my story...please let me know what you think by clicking the review button even if it's just to say "cool" or "nice job"**


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